I leave Africa in ELEVEN days. I cannot believe it. It does not seem possible to me that I have been in this country for almost three weeks.
God sent his angel to shut the lions mouth so that they would not hurt me for I have been found innocent in his sight. Not a scratch was found on him for he had trusted in his God. -- Daniel 6:22,23
A bible story that I have heard all my life became a very real thing for me on Sunday. Our team got to play with 18 month old lions. These guys were the size of us. We were armed with two trainers and some sticks. Other than that... we were told to not make eye contact and stay behind the shoulder. As we were playing with these amazing creatures I could not help but thin if what a miracle Daniel experienced. At any point one of these huge cats could have taken my head off. They were trained dont worry mom. :) But the point is that I felt my fraility and Gods power as I watched these animals walk and jump from trees. It was the most amazing moment of my life but my heart continued to beat at a very fast pace until we had left the lion walking area. Livingston was incredible.
The last few days have been hard. A few of our team members have gone home and the youngest Zibani really connected with one of the boys. He was in the corner crying with his goodbye note yesterday and I had to hold my breath to stop the tears. I could not figure out why I was not able to look past it like the other team until God brought up why he had brought Naza and I together last night. Between the tears God spoke to me about the way I love and the way I walk in fear of pain. But this trip... this trip will end with tears and my heart broken in places. Not in a bad way but it wont be a walk in the part.
Psalm 52:8 says that I will trust in the unfailing love of God forever. So if he is supplying with the kind of love I need for the people and circumstances around me, than he will supply the strength to let go and realize feeling pain is only a part of life, it does not have to dictate how I live. Naza and I are inseparable when we are at the shelter. He does not speak alot of english, mostly njanje. But he knows how to ask if I am coming tomorrow. In eleven days I will have to say No. Leave him with a note and a promise to write when I get home.
The Lord gave me 2 Timothy 1:7-8 says that God has not given us a spirit of fear and timidity but of power, love and self discipline. That boy has opened up my heart to love. Which sounds in itself cliche but the walls I place around me to protect myself from the world have come crashing down. But in a gentle way. In a way where I know that I will never forget that boy no matter how hard it is on July 2nd to leave that compound.
God has given me an amazing girl on my team to connect with and she has been my saving grace. I have never been so thankful for the presence of a person in my life. Team dynamics are still trying but a wise person gave me a thought to think about. Our brothers and sisters in Christ have a way of stretching us. As I feel the anger flare those words pop into my head and God reminds me of Matthew 7:1-2. The lord is about unity and I am learning how to walk in truth despite some very trying circumstances.
So for the weeks ahead well... we shall see what God has in store. Until then love you all !!1
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i'm so happy to hear how well you're doing,Kate. it's been encouraging to me as well. Separation pains are never fun,but they are a part of life. I've been wrestling with that feeling myself,but as you know, we must trust and rest in him. When do that, anything's possible,huh? You are so strong and faithful in Him. Keep walkin with Him! I can't wait to see you again.
ReplyDeletetake care,Friend